


Different Libraries Entirely

by fragilecapricornpanic



Series: AU One Shots [5]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - No Apocalypse (Umbrella Academy), Angst, Angst and Humor, Everyone Needs A Hug, Feels, Fluff, Gen, Humor, Luther Hargreeves Has a Human Body, No Apocalypse, Number Five | The Boy is So Done, Number Five | The Boy-centric, One Shot, POV Alternating, POV Number Five | The Boy, Post-Canon, Stressed Number Five | The Boy, Time Travel Fix-It, Vanya Hargreeves Deserves Better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 07:15:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27169873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fragilecapricornpanic/pseuds/fragilecapricornpanic
Summary: AU One shot - ”Really, Five?” Diego questioned incredulously, astounded that he wanted to have this meeting in the bowling alley. “Clearly it went so well here last time.” Klaus sarcastically drawled, resting his head on Vanya’s shoulder like she hadn’t just ended the world. Diego felt on edge sitting on her other side, even if he’d been assured she was in her medicated 2013 body. The same unfortunately applied to Klaus. “Do you have any better suggestions?!” Five snarled, turning around in the drivers seat he was ridiculously sat in. How could he even see over the wheel? “Not in here...” Luther grumbled, his tall stature leaving him crushed by the roof of the car.
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy & Luther Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & The Hargreeves (Umbrella Academy), Number Five | The Boy & Vanya Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy (Umbrella Academy) & Everyone
Series: AU One Shots [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1965310
Comments: 5
Kudos: 101





	Different Libraries Entirely

**Author's Note:**

> This was written before season 2 so obviously there’s no spoilers

A strong sense of dejavú hit Five as he clumsily landed in the academy’s courtyard. Pulling himself upright, Five sighed with relief. If the academy was still standing it meant there was a chance the apocalypse could be avoided. Looking around, Five noticed he was the only person to have actually emerged from the vortex. Shit. Luther suddenly sprinted into the courtyard, right on que. “I just landed in my room!” That must mean the others also landed wherever they were on this day originally. Great.

“Wh-when did dad turn you into a monkey?!” It was dawning on Five that Luther looked like a somewhat normal human again. What year was it?! His brother glared at him. “My apologies,” Five threw his hands up pacifistically “an ape.”

Luther rolled his eyes and looked down to his body. His eyes grew incredibly wide as the realisation hit him too. “I’m me again!” Luther exclaimed, grinning ear to ear as he rubbed at his fully human arms. He was still ginormous, but he definitely had normal proportions. He actually looked kind of scrawny, now that Five was used to the human/ape hybrid.

“Uh...” Luther tried to focus on the question, but it was hard to think of anything but the overwhelming joy he felt. This was his dream come true. Holy shit. “Six years ago.” he mumbled, still unable to look up from his normal build. Now Five was the only one with a weird body!

“Shit...” his brother paced circles around Ben’s statue, which made Luther feel a pit of guilt for breaking it. That didn’t matter anymore. They had a chance to start over. They could actually speak to Ben again, now they knew Klaus wasn’t bullshitting. “First and foremost, we need to find the others.” Five bossily declared, something Luther had no qualms about. This whole week had been a colossal mess, and Luther had made a series of terrible mistakes. Five could deal with the chaos. He seemed to be deep in thought, lost in his own contemplation.

“Um...” Luther held his hand up like a school child. “Pogo knows a lot of stuff.” he shrugged, feeling kind of queasy at the thought of the chimp after seeing him killed. Five clicked his fingers in response, evidently pleased with that statement.

Five began to march towards the doors but suddenly stopped before he entered. He hadn’t seen dad in a very long time. Although there was no rush anymore to prevent the apocalypse, Five didn’t particularly want to interact with his father anyway. Luther walked straight into him due to the sudden halt, which flew Five over the threshold like a rag doll. Well that was one way to rip off the bandaid. Five stood up again with Luther’s unwanted support, brushing away his huge hand with a scowl. “Maybe it should just be you in the house...” Five really wanted to avoid their father. It would just mean getting belittled for not re-emerging as an acorn.

“Dad was always in his study anyway after everyone moved out. He won’t be around.” Luther reassured him, looking almost as nervous as Five felt.

He nodded and followed Luther to find Pogo. “This should be fun.” Five sarcastically muttered, dreading trying to track down his siblings. They would undoubtedly make this a difficult task.

—

Assuming seeing Luther would make Vanya freak out even more, Five sent him to find Diego. Luther had also insisted on calling Allison too, obviously. Neither of them wanted to find Klaus. Now Five nervously approached Vanya’s old/current apartment. He hoped to god he’d gotten here before she’d had a chance to freak out. At least she would be suitably medicated, based on Luther having the physiology of six years ago. Which was another part of the reason neither Five nor Luther wanted to get Klaus.

Jumping straight through the door, Five braced himself for his sister’s understandable break down. Five had never been good at emotions, and especially not after so long in the apocalypse. “Vanya?” he murmured cautiously, shuffling further within the apartment.

“Five.” Vanya croakily whispered, which was confusing because Five couldn’t see her. Following the sound of her voice, Five realised she was crouched on the floor, cowering behind her knees.

“Vanya...” Five timidly stepped towards her, terrified of somehow making things worse “...it’s okay. We went back. It’s 2013.” Five kneeled down beside his sister, frowning at the distress evident on Vanya’s face.

“I... Pogo, I...” Vanya ran her hands through her hair, looking utterly distraught.

“It’s okay,” Five tentatively moved closer, gently placing a hand on Vanya’s arm “he’s alive. I just spoke to him.” Vanya blearily glanced over to Five, a look of comforted disbelief on her face. “None of that’s happened yet, and it isn’t going to.” Five assured her with certainty, he wasn’t going to let them repeat the same mistakes. They had to protect Vanya. “We’re here for you this time. All of us.” He smiled sadly, and Vanya returned the favor.

“I’m so sorry.” Vanya whimpered, shoving her face back down onto her knees.

“You don’t need to be sorry, Vanya.” Five softly insisted, tapping on her arm to prompt her to bring her head back up. “This wasn’t your fault.” It wasn’t. It was dad’s. It was all of her siblings’. It was a multitude of factors, but none of them were Vanya’s doing. She reluctantly pulled her head back up to force a teary smirk. “Come on, I’m gathering the morons.” Five rose to his feet, tenderly beckoning for Vanya to join him. She seemed unsure about doing so. Five reached a hand down to help her up, refusing to leave without her. “If I have to deal with their idiocy, so do you.”

—

”Really, Five?” Diego questioned incredulously, astounded that he really wanted to have this meeting in the bowling alley.

“Well clearly it went so well here last time.” Klaus sarcastically drawled, casually resting his head on Vanya’s shoulder as if she hadn’t just ended the world. Diego felt on edge sitting on her other side, even if he’d been assured she was in her 2013 body and therefore medicated. The same unfortunately applied to Klaus.

“Do you have any better suggestions?!” Five snarled, turning around in the drivers seat he was ridiculously sat in. How could he even see over the wheel?

“Not in here...” Luther grumbled, his extremely tall stature leaving him crushed by the roof of the car.

Where the hell else were they supposed to go? Griddy’s would be off the cards too according to these standards. “Dad’s home and a liability.” Five pointed at Luther, who seemed to share that opinion. “Your former girlfriend asks far too many questions.” Five gestured towards Diego, unimpressed with Eudora’s level of interest in what was going on. “And you...” Five grimaced at Klaus, unsure what that place actually was. “It would be a health and safety risk to go there.” he decided on judgementally declaring. Klaus dopily nodded, agreeing with Five’s sentiment.

They all slowly turned to expectantly stare at Vanya. They were hesitant to ask for her help, given the destruction she’d just caused. Vanya anxiously moved her eyes to briefly glance at all of her brothers. “My place is empty?...”

—

”Where’s Allie?” Klaus dozily complained as they stepped over Vanya’s doorway.

“She’s on a plane, like I’ve told you ten ti-“ Five cut himself off to splutter with intense exasperation “Can somebody else deal with him?!” Five jumped across the room, desperate to get away from his nonsense.

The others awkwardly shuffled into the small apartment, looking around the place as though they’d entered another planet. “Let’s just get this part over with.” Five scanned his sights across his four siblings, and likely the ghost of Ben. “They’ve all been assholes to you, and they’re sorry.” Five addressed Vanya bluntly, receiving several defensive exclamations in return.

“You bailed on her for sixteen years!”

Because obviously the apocalypse had been so fun for him. “You’re right, you’re right.” Five spoke to One, Two, and Four with an appearance of sincerity. “I’m sorry that I got stranded in a post-apocalyptic wasteland at 13, and spent 45 years in isolation.” he deadpanned, scowling at his simpleton brothers. They all spoke again, though this time with awkward apologies. “Allison will be here in a few hours. Can we manage not to destroy the world before then?” he condescendingly sent that question to his brothers, very aware that Vanya wasn’t a risk right now.

All three of them gazed over to Vanya with evident worry. Five groaned with frustration, jumping across the room to make some coffee. How could they miss his implication so spectacularly?

—

After several excruciatingly long hours of chaotic discussion, Five was probably close to overdosing on caffeine. “So let’s go through this one last time, just to make sure we’re all on the same page.” Five had already said this statement four times, and every single time they’d quite clearly not been on the same page. They weren’t even on the same book, they were actually in different libraries entirely.

His siblings nodded wearily, obviously as exhausted as Five. “Luther.” Five held up the sheet of paper with Number One’s plan on. “You leave the academy, _without_ getting revenge on dad.” Five placed stern emphasis on the last part of that sentence, very determined for Luther not to fuck up this timeline too. Trying to persuade him not to at the very least sucker punch dad was like pulling teeth. The others had only encouraged him, since they were all as stupid as each other. It was like they shared one collective brain cell. Number One opened his mouth to object but begrudgingly closed it and nodded his agreement. Thank God. “And you and Diego grow the hell up and stop the rivalry.” Five looked to Diego too. They both eventually said yes after a period of Five intensely glowering at them. Wonderful. One down, five to go.

Holding up the piece of paper dedicated to Number Two, Five felt slightly more at ease that Diego would accept the terms. His were by far the simplest to follow. “You do not get fired from the police academy, you stay with your extremely nosy girlfriend-“ Diego scowled at him with offence “-and you stop treating Vanya like shit.” Diego winced slightly with remorse, turning to give Vanya a sympathetic smile.

“Fine by me.” Diego agreed with a nonchalant shrug. Vanya mirrored his smile, seeming still in an emotional daze from the recent events. That wasn’t really a surprise. She’d blown up the moon. Five exhaled with relief, hoping the others would be as submissive. He wasn’t going to hold his breath. It would probably be downhill from here.

Swapping the paper for Number Three’s sheet, Five displayed it to Allison. “You stop using your power for everything, and _especially_ on your daughter.” Five tried not to show too much disdain in his voice, since Allison had already lost her shit several times about their judgemental disapproval.

Apparently Allison had already stopped using her power in 2019, and was even more put off it after the elephant in the room regarding her throat - but she was worried about exceptional circumstances. Like the apocalypse 2.0. “Can I use them sometimes?” Allison replied in a way that was half pleading and half confusion. Five was far too tired to get into this circular discussion again.

“Sure, why not.” Five apathetically retorted, deciding to just get her to stop asking questions so they could move on. Allison nodded, though it was clear she was reluctant. Five could tediously go over this again with her later, once they’d all had time to process things.

Placing Allison’s paper down, Five sighed deeply as he picked up the several sheets dedicated to Number Four. It was incredibly unlikely he’d be willing to engage with any of this, he was blatantly already fiercely craving his next hit. “You get sober again.” Five pointed to the part of the sheet that Klaus had clearly withheld details about. Five would just make Luther tie him up, that should do the trick. “You make Ben corporeal again.” Five stared to the spot where Ben was supposedly sat. It was still hard to trust anything Klaus said, even if they now definitely knew Ben was a ghost. “You call Vanya’s old therapist.” Klaus intensified the chewing of his nails, not loving this plan at all. “We train your power properly.” It had been news to them all that no such thing had happened to begin with. “Do you agree, yes or no?” Five droningly questioned, much too fatigued for the inevitable theatrics.

“I’m just...” Klaus coyly shrugged, beginning to slide up from his seat. “I think we can all agree that I had nothing to do with the end of the world. I was just minding my own beeswax. What I do doesn’t make a difference, it’s ir-“ Luther yanked him back down before he could rush towards the door. Five massaged his temples, considering just asking Allison to make an exception to the rules so she could rumor Klaus into compliance. “I changed my mind!” he desperately exclaimed, attempting to make Luther let go as though he couldn’t hold back a tank. Or ten.

“Just keep ahold of him.” Five curtly demanded to Luther, too worn out to continue with this fight.

Shoving down Klaus’ little pile, Five unenthusiastically picked up his own sheet. He just chose to ignore Klaus’ continued whining. “I leave Delores in the department store...” Five mumbled solemnly, still grieving the loss of her. She probably wasn’t even made yet anyway. “I cut down on my drinking.” Five agreed through gritted teeth, displeased with that particular demand. He wasn’t going to be a little bitch about it though, unlike _somebody_. “And I try to redevelop my empathy.” he continued, actually feeling content with that part. Five definitely struggled to empathise with anyone but his family after such a long time trapped in isolation. He had many amends to make in terms of karma, if such a thing existed. Five had bullshitted and told his siblings that the commission would no longer be hunting him, since the apocalypse had technically happened in their original timeline. Five assumed that wouldn’t be the case, but he also knew his family would make things even more of a mess if they got involved in trying to take down the handler and her posey. He could deal with that alone. Maybe he’d get Ben and his handy tentacles involved if Klaus could actually get clean again.

The room fell into unbearably awkward silence as Five swapped his sheet for Number Seven’s. Even Klaus stopped begging to be released. “Vanya...” Five wasn’t sure if the paper was shaking in his hand due to the excessive caffeine or his stress. “You also call your old therapist.” Vanya nodded expressionlessly. She knew it was necessary. “You speak with one of us-“ Five pointed between himself and Allison, the others obviously being useless “-every day, just to let us know you’re okay.” Vanya nodded again, anxiously looking to Allison then quickly looking away again out of guilt. “We slowly wean you off the medication, and we train your power.” This was the stickler, Vanya was terrified of accidentally ending the world again. Which was very rational, given what just happened.

“You’ll be okay, Vanya. I promise.” Allison kindly told her, smiling empathetically. Five’s brothers unenthusiastically and unconvincingly backed Allison up. Vanya nodded again, still too distraught to speak much.

“Okay, great. Everyone sign this.” Five handed a contract and pen to Vanya to be passed across the room. It wouldn’t hold up in a court of law, nor would it ever be brought to one - but Five knew his siblings were moronic enough to be pressured by a meaningless contract. “Sign it.” Five irately hissed at Klaus, too tired for his petulance. Klaus stubbornly passed the contract to Allison without signing. Five clicked at Luther, signalling for him to tie Klaus up with the rope he’d preemptively been sent to get whilst they waited for Allison. Luther was so keen to follow orders, it was very useful for Five. The others finished signing the phoney contract and densely passed it to Five to sign, as if he hadn’t been the one to have written it. “You people never cease to amaze me with your sheer stupidity.” Now they’d escaped the apocalypse, how was Five going to deal with his siblings’ slowness for the rest of his days?


End file.
